Distraction

 I often find myself being distracted from what I need to do, usually work, by something or other. Youtube is a repeat offender for this, but not exclusively so. 

The knowledge that I'm never quite doing as much as I could do I think haunts me in a way, always looming, probably part of the reason I usually feel quite inadequate in most aspects of my life. I wonder if I have a condition, but in a way I think this is more wishful thinking, as it would simply be nice to have something to blame my shortcomings on. 

This lack of productivity is almost definitely also why I get so frustrated when I *am* engaged in my work, and something else interrupts, that being a cat desperate for attention, or a chore that really should be handled as soon as possible. Getting into the working headspace is difficult enough as it is, and now I'm not my only opponent? How horrible, right?

One of my secret new years resolutions (as opposed to the public ones, like eating more cheese) is to be more focused at work, be less distracted, and I gotta say so far, it has been a resounding failure. I haven't finished the one task I picked up all on my own, and now I'm here, yelling into the void again. I suppose the idea is that this is more productive than watching 45 minutes of nothing, before telling myself I'll get back to work, right after this other 20 minute nothingburger (imagine a burger). 

I often appreciate the days where my schedule is packed with other things, like meetings, because at least then I have an excuse. 

But then I need to focus less on excuses and look more towards solutions. Hopefully I'll figure something out one of these days.